Being a mom is great. But being a mom also means putting myself second.
I've always known that placing myself second would be most challenging since I love taking care of myself. There's nothing wrong with doing things for me, but nowadays I rarely do. YES, I miss it.
Ever since Noah came into our lives - we've been learning many things about him & ourselves. For one, I was never a patient person. With baby, I find myself practicing patience even when I DON'T want to!
The most challenging days are the ones where I just don't know why he's crying. He isn't much of a crier to begin with, unless he's tired or hungry. Go figure. Other than that, he's pretty relaxed. When he's not hungry or tired & he cries, I get the most anxious. I find myself trying "everything" I've learned to get him to stop, and the few times it doesn't ....I feel LOST. I'm sure I'm NOT the only MOM to feel this way.... so, this is why I'm writing this today. Real life has an interesting way of surprising us & making us face our our biggest fears. Every single day I realize I'm facing new challenges & new fears while raising our son, and I can't stress enough... the importance of patience. I'll be honest, I'm still trying to master the patience 'mode' myself.
As I write this, another thought is running through my mind..... BUSINESS + BABY. Believe it or not, I am still trying to manage my business while raising our son. Yes, I have some p/t help with a nanny & family members, but I find myself letting go of one thing or the other. Don't get me wrong, I love what I do, but I also know that Noah will need more of my time at some point. In my heart, I've always wanted to be a mom...but not an 'absent- mom' where work becomes more important than my family. So many thoughts keep coming to mind about just quitting my work & focusing more on him for a few years. Although he drains most of my energy, I love being around him & his BIG smile. He is such a blessing.
I'll be blunt, the thought of being a stay-at-home mom SCARES the heck out of me. Hmmm, maybe I could just paint & care for him. I definitely need a creative outlet of some sort.... I'd love to know if any moms out there quit their jobs to tend to their kids at home? Would that be a life that would drive me crazy? OR would I embrace it? How many moms out there are doing both??? Working & caring for their kids? or How many moms left work altogether to care for their children? - I've been wondering about this.